It was last week, you guys. During part one of Top Chef’s Season Finale, Emeril said it loud and clear for all to hear. Did you miss it? Here is what he said:
My heart just about melted, y’all! This whole season I have admired Emeril and his way of being direct but kind to the cheftestants. I have written posts like Top 10 Things You May Not Have Known About Emeril and tweeted it to him. I have mentioned how I appreciated his candor and his supportive words to Sheldon during the last episode. Little did I know, he was noticing me! He noticed me SO much, that he declared that he loved me! Right on national television!
I think I must have missed some of the conversation that preceded his declaration. Maybe they were talking about the bloggers writing about Top Chef this season? I could have sworn they were talking about the food Sheldon, Brooke and Kristen were making, but…I mean, there it is as plain as day: “I LOVE THE ADDITION OF THE NETTLES.” I hadn’t been a part of blogging for this show before this season. It blows my mind that he recognized that!
Hold on, you guys. My husband is trying to get my attention.
“What, Chris? I’m writing a blog post here. Can’t you see that?”
“He wasn’t talking about you!”
“Well, he wasn’t talking about you either! I know your last name is Nettles, too, but you aren’t writing jacksquat about Top Chef!”
“He wasn’t talking about our last name at all, you loon! He was talking about Brooke’s dish!”
“What does that have to do with our last name and Emeril’s love for me? This is ridiculous! I’m right in the middle of the post, dingdangit!”
“BROOKE MADE BRAISED SHORT RIBS, PARMESAN SAUCE, NETTLE PUREE AND SQUASH DUMPLINGS!!!!”
Man, can I have a minute? Maybe look away from the screen for a second?
Emeril wasn’t talking about me, y’all!!! This means he probably never saw ONE tweet I wrote about him nor has he ever read ONE blog post about him that I have written! THIS CUTS ME TO THE CORE!
I guess I had forgotten for a minute that my last name is a plant that people use to cook with sometimes. That last name of mine has caused me more problems…
|A patch of STINGING nettles. How do you like that? Source|
For example, at my former job, I once heard this over the loud speaker:
“Kelley Nelly, you have a phone call. Kelley Nelly, you have a phone call.”
I didn’t answer it. No one was going to think my name was Kelley Nelly. If I answered that phone in front of a waiting room full of people, they’d all think, “That poor soul has the name Kelley Nelly.” So, I hid inside a cabinet full of gauze and band-aids until the moment passed. Or maybe I jumped inside a sharps container? It was so long ago that I can’t remember exactly.
Yesterday, someone said “Ms. Needles”. NEEDLES? Needles has TWO E’s, son! I’ve got two T’s! For goodness sakes!
On mail, we often get “Nertles” and “Netless”, so that’s nice. Those are my favorites.
My mood changed about my last name when I saw Jennifer Nettles from the country group Sugar Land come on the scene. I bet we could start a support group. (Anyone know her number?)
|Maybe we’re cousins? Source|
One of these days, I’m going to meet her and we’re going to have lots and lots of laughs over the experiences we’ve had with this last name that means one of the following:
- (n) any plant of the genus Urtica, covered with stinging hairs.
(n) any of various allied or similar plants.
(v) to irritate, annoy, or provoke.
(v) to sting as a nettle does.
Those definitions actually made me laugh out loud just now. Here are some more things I learned about nettles while writing this post (for anyone that gives a flyin’ flip) from DryIt.com: they can be made into pudding, beer, and other types of food; they are high in protein and good for soups, stews and casseroles; they are great for medicine and help to stop bleeding and congestion; they can be made into tea to help relieve acne and eczema; added to chicken feed, they will increase egg production; for cows, better milk production; nettles help produce a healthier, glossier coat in animals.
What REALLY cracks me up??
In Britain, there is a National Be Nice To Nettles week in May. Ha! For real, I’m going to start a new tradition in our family where I learn to make some of those nettles dishes. I’ll make banners to put in my house that say: “NATIONAL BE NICE TO NETTLES WEEK”. We’ll all have to be EXTRA nice to each other in our family. I’m LOVING these ideas! (Maybe I’ll make some pins to wear while out and about).
Back to Brooke, she made nettle puree and she actually used “skinny nettles”. Ha!! There is such thing as skinny nettles. This is awesome, as I’m currently on a mission to lose 10 pounds over the next 6 weeks. I want to become a skinny nettles. The ingredients for her puree:
- Half cup blanched skinny nettles
- 1 tablespoon honey
- 1/8 cup extra virgin olive oil
- 1 shallot, diced
- Juice and zest of 1 Meyer lemon