My Obsession with Justin Bieber


…doesn’t actually exist.

But, don’t tell my 7-year-old son that.

He thinks I really, really like Justin Bieber.

When he sees Justin Bieber stuff at the store or on TV, he’ll say, “Oh, Mom! Look what I found for you! It’s Justin Bieber!”

He showed me this at Barnes & Noble yesterday.

This is when I act excited. “Did you find Justin Bieber for me? Thanks, dude!”

I don’t have the heart to break it to him that all of his efforts at finding Justin Bieber stuff for me is really wasting his time.

And that I am old enough to be Justin Bieber’s mom. I would have been a teen mom, but I could have had that skinny little thing.

I can’t bear to tell him that Justin Drew Bieber sort of looks like a lady my mom plays Pokeno with once a month on Sundays.

I’ll admit it. I was on a “Baby, Baby oooohhh…” kick for a little bit. After that, I was interested in how he rose to super stardom. I never saw the movie “Never Say Never”, but I probably would have if someone wanted to go see it. I have Googled him playing drums at a young age.

I also own two of his CDs.

Okay, okay, and just yesterday, I watched his YouTube video for “As Long As You Love Me”, sang the lines “As long as you love me, we could be starving, we could be homeless, we could be broke” adoringly in my husband’s direction as he rolled his eyes and then I tried to memorize Big Sean’s lines. (He raps too dang fast!)

And felt sad that the man in the video beat Justin Bieber up. He has a mom! Get your hands off of him, you mean man! Justin Bieber used to be a small boy! Okay, he still is, but still! Hands off!

And I regularly quote, “She had me going crazy, oh, I was star-struck. She woke me up daily, don’t need no Starbucks!” from Ludacris’s part in Baby.

And sometimes I fix my 7-year-old’s hair to look Bieber-ish, since it’s the same color and texture and everything.

But, yeah, I am not OBSESSED with Justin Bieber. Please. I am not a tween, after all! My music tastes are more refined and mature.

I’m also not at all jealous of mothers that get to take their girls to Justin Bieber concerts either. NOT AT ALL. I wouldn’t want to go to a Justin Bieber concert. See what mothers of tween daughters had to witness in Arizona last night? A queazy Biebs! So glad I missed that!

(Did someone give him some Pepto Bismol?? I really hope he got some Pepto Bismol. I wonder if he recovered quickly? Oh, poor thing.)

One of these days, I will set my 7-year-old straight and tell him to quit telling his friends at school that his mother loves Justin Bieber. How embarrassing. (He told me this weekend that he told all of his friends that at school last week.) I will have to break it to him that I’m one of those types that likes music no one has ever heard of before. I’m one of those types that likes really mature, sophisticated, ORIGINAL stuff, you know? I feel sad that my own son doesn’t know this about me yet.

Yeah, that’s the kind of person I am…

So, yeah, anyway…ummm…



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