Here is an example of our banter, which you may have seen in a tweet of mine last week:
Me (on a scale): I HATE YOUR FACE, SCALE!
Him: Is it supposed to smoke like that?
*We both laugh*
(He’s lucky I have a sense of humor.)
See what I mean?
(By the way, I’m on SlimFast right now. It’s not because of his “smoking” comment, I just was ready to drink low calorie drinks for breakfast and lunch EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. I’m enjoying it. Can you tell. Can you hear the glee in my voice.)
Anyway, I thought I should point out the “we’re just joking” bit before anyone took me too seriously. My Some eCard about my husband’s 5-step plan for cleaning the kitchen offended some, I think. My husband is awesome and helps in TONS of other ways- just not in the kitchen. For the record, I know lots of men clean that lots of things in a house, such as my own dad. He cooks, cleans, does laundry, vacuums, mows the yard, etc. So, yeah, men are awesome. This is not a men-bashing blog, FYI. I’ve got two little men running around my house and I love them with all of my heart.
But, back to my husband.
I made a little chart about him:
He loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooves fireworks.
Can you tell?
He used to save some through the year when he was younger. He had a drawer full that his mother discovered once. He wasn’t Timothy McVeigh or anything. He just liked to blow little stuff up.
When he’s ready to shell out the cash, he’s in front of the fireworks stand. My only request is that he comes back with some sparklers and some bang snaps for the boys and me. And maybe a smoke bomb. He usually comes back with the rest of the fireworks stand. If he could, he’d fit the whole plywood structure, complete with shady looking fireworks seller guy, in the back of the SUV.
When I asked him earlier what he spent his money on the most, he looked at me and said, “What do you think? Y’all and lunch.”
You’ll notice the “us” sliver is quite small, which, of course, is a joke.
It should be smaller.
That was also a joke. He spends lots of money on us. Obviously. He also spends money on charitable causes, too. I saw you giving him a dirty look. Gotta stand up for my man.
(Unless I’m the one making fun of him. You know how that goes.)
But, yeah, he loves those fireworks.
I’m not really joking about that “lunch” sliver of the pie. Whenever we are driving through town, I will see a restaurant I’d like to try and, 9 times out of 10, he’s been there before. With work people. It’s like they’re living it up at lunch.
“PARTY AT LUNCH!!! WHO’S IN?? WOOOOO-HOOOOO!!!” they must all shout out at 11:52 a.m.
At least he got me some sparklers.
And bang snaps.
(He forgot the smoke bomb.)
Most Clicked Links from Last Week
#1 – Journey to the Bottom of my Purse ODNT
#2 – Throwing it Down with Spanx The Mom of the Year
#3 – Dressing Room Mirror Bitch Slap Let Me Start By Saying… In the Powder Room
#4 – I Feel a Thong Coming On Wrestling with Retirement
#5 – Tie – Named after Christ and Looking for a Jewish Guy Outlaw Mama
#5 – Tie – SHE vs. HIM: Ready Actual Times May Vary