8 Rejected Smoothie King Flavors

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Can I get you a scoop of Pepto-Bismol ice cream?
Image from http://www.bildungblog.blogspot.com/

 Little do you know it, but I have been making it my life’s work for the last 5 years to get these smoothie flavors accepted at Smoothie Kings across the land.  It actually has been my life’s work for longer than that, as I used these exact same flavors at little stands set up at the end of my driveway when I was but a lass.  You were selling lemonade.  I was selling smoothies.  To my mother.  And grandmother.  And dad.  No one else ever seemed interested for some reason.   Even though every single Smoothie King  has showed me to the door time and time again in recent years, I am not giving up!!  It is my hope that with this post, I will gather some support that will give me courage to get back on the road with my samples. 

#1: Pepto Peppermint Passion: This frothy pink drink will be a delight to your hot, clammy, able-to-melt-metal-with-one-whiff mouth.  Anyone you speak with will be extremely grateful.

#2: Pepto Passionfruit: You will feel like taking on the world with one sip of this delicious concoction.  You will also get the urge to kick in lots of doors.  I always drink one before going to visit a Smoothie King to pitch my products.

It makes EVERYTHING taste better!

#3: Peanutbutter and Pepto: Who’s Jelly?  That smelly jelly ain’t never gettin’ back in this felly’s belly!  (This also provides all the protein you’ll ever, ever, ever need.  In one drink.)
#4: Let’s Get Down To Bis….mol: For the more serious smoothie lovers, this drink provides all the vitamins you’ll ever need in your whole entire life and then some.  You will likely grow two feet in height within 24 hours of finishing off this beverage.



#5: Buttermilk Bis…mol: This is an excellent breakfast shake.  Smoothed to an awesome puree are buttermilk biscuits, gravy, sausage, Canadian bacon, bacon, hash browns, more buttermilk biscuits, butter, eggs and a dash of Pepto Bismol to help it all go down.

#6: Put A Little Pepto In Your Stepto:  Just before you go out for a walk, you’ll want to down one of these suckers.  This one has three kinds of “pep”- PEPper, PEPto and the kind of PEP that makes you want to sing Broadway songs as loud as you possibly can.  You’ll complete 5 miles in less than 30 seconds and wonder where this drink has been all your life.

#7 Salt, Salt, Salt, Salt, Salt, Salt, Salt & Pep: This smoothie has nothing but salt and Pepto and is made specifically for those who have low sodium levels out there.  Grandmothers, I’m looking at you.  Equally interesting for the grandmothers out there, this one comes with a free Salt & Pepa CD.

#8: Pepto Bismol Perfection:  This is entirely made of Pepto Bismol that has been frozen, whipped, iced and dipped.  This the one I would order every single time.

 What flavor can I get for you??
(Why is that freak of nature so obsessed with Pepto Bismol? Click here and scroll to the bottom to read my very first post.)

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Today’s Juice In The City Deal
*look for a deal in your area in the right hand column*



One Smoothie King that I have yet to visit is the one on South Fry Road in Katy.  Since they are offering a $5 coupon for $10 worth of smoothies, I may just go over there soon to ask them.  I know they won’t be offering any of my flavors YET, so I’ll have to pick from their list of flavors that include things like banana, peach, strawberry, blueberry, etc.  I always like to get a dash of something, an “enhancer” in my drink, so that I feel extra healthy when I walk out of there.  To get your deal, go HERE.


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