Chinese restaurants have caused some drama in this small family of mine. It started with my sister...in the 1980's. She hated Chinese food and would always cry if my parents wanted her to eat some. [Sidenote: She now eats great quantities of sushi. She and her husband actually frequent one sushi restaurant so often their faces were painted on the wall (click here).] When she was a little squid and crying over not wanting Chinese food, it was likely because she had only tried it once and it was probably "Kung Pao Chicken" that she ate. One bite surely felt similar to a raging fire ripping through her teeth, tongue, cheeks and soft palate like a cigarette to some dry woods. I don't know how else to explain my six-year-old sister flailing around the outside fountain with her mouth wide open. When she went diving for loose change, her mouth was usually closed. George Costanza apparently had an unfortunate incident occur after eating Kung Pao chicken as well...
Flash forward to 2008ish when Minit Lube down the street transformed into a Chinese restaurant. I don't care what beautiful name that nice family agonized over for the title of their beloved eatery, it is "Minit Lube Chinese" to us. You would think that my arrogant, cocky attitude about the name meant that I have never frequented the place in these last two years. You'd be wrong, brother. My boos and I have eaten there several times. They serve fried wontons before your meal comes out. Sold. When sister tried to put some salsa on the table, I yelled, "BE TRUE TO YOURSELF!!!!" followed by "Can we get some more wontons?" in the sweetest voice you ever did hear. I acted like nothing had happened and she scurried away with our empty basket and plans to refill our teas. Anyway, I am always stumped by the fact that Minit Lube Chinese isn't offering "Moo Goo Oil Pan" yet. My husband, Chris, on the other hand, won't eat there. He likes Chinese food, but not when the egg roll is fried in the same oil used to lubricate his car. He apparently is high maintenance like my sister.
Most of the time we eat at Pei Wei.
|Fortune cookie slippers by Sushibooties, http://www.etsy.com/|
Chris says this fortune should just say: "You will see me again".
Modern English I Melt With You
If you have any "fortunes" to add, please do. I plan on sending my list to area restaurants and to Confucius himself even. I am also going to ask him to see if he can do anything to influence Chinese restaurants across the land to tone down that Kung Pao a notch. I am getting so embarrassed of my sister's fountain swimming habit.
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